escape scenarios, natural disasters, and my toothbrush

my sister (her name is michelle) and i recently discovered we both have some things in common.

1. if we were on board an airplane that was hurtling to the ground, we are 100% certain we would survive the impact.

2. if we were to be involved in some sort of disaster scenario (fire, flood, random sniper rampage, terrorist explosion, etc.) we are 100% certain we would survive.

3. all day every day we create escape scenarios in our heads.

how can i be 100% positive i'll survive? i don't know, it's just an overwhelming feeling of certainty. over-confidence? perhaps. does my body contain adamantium? perhaps. is it logical? absolutely not. but in our minds it's an indisputable and absolute truth.

as for the escape scenarios; it's not as if we're obsessing and living in a constant state of paranoia. let's say a red light happens to place my car under an overpass or bridge. while i wait for the light to change, my mind wanders to what i would do if there was an earthquake at that moment.

"okay. these cars have me blocked in, so i should lay flat across the seats so that when the falling debris lands on my roof i won't be crushed to death."

when i'm in the drive through at starbucks my mind wanders to:

"what if the guy behind me were to leap out of his truck with a gun and approach my car? normally i could easily swerve over that median and speed away; but since there's a streetlight blocking my path - i'll swing open my door, throw the car in reverse, and bash him into the ground. while he's stunned/unconscious, i'll get out of the car and run across the street."

jihadist bomb in the movie theater? not a problem. armed robbery at the bank? no worries. gang motivated drive-by shooting on my block? well, i'm working on that one.

i usually remain calm during emergencies, but have never really been put to the test in a real-world situation. i've always wondered if i would buckle under the pressure or would my über-confidence kick in and save my life as i've come to expect?

i found out last week when we had a 5.4 earthquake. here's how it went down:

i'm in the bathroom brushing my teeth, getting ready for work. i hear a loud rumbling and at first think it's a garbage truck outside. it wasn't garbage day. as i felt the ground slip underneath my feet i casually opened the bathroom door, held onto the door frame with one hand and continued to brush my teeth with the other - and watched as the entire living room violently swayed back and forth. items were now falling onto the ground and for the full 30 seconds i just continued to brush my teeth and observe. my main concern was not staying alive, it was getting ready so i wouldn't be late for work. i'm not going to let some earthquake put a kink in my schedule. the rumbling stops, i spit in the sink, and go iron my shirt.

i'm ready for the next disaster. living near LA, i know it's just a matter of time. come on, mother nature. bring it.